the 50 most loathsome people...

15. Karl Rove

Charges: A greasy pig whose only distinction in life is his total lack of decency. Rove is decidedly not a genius; he is simply missing the part of his soul that prevents the rest of us from kicking elderly women in the face. His admirers have elevated fanatical, amoral ambition to the status of a virtue, along with lying, cheating, and negligent homicide, all in the name of “values.” Quite possibly the worst person in the worst White House in American history.

Exhibit A: “As people do better, they start voting like Republicans - unless they have too much education and vote Democratic, which proves there can be too much of a good thing.”

Sentence: Lowered head first into oil refinery smokestack.


The rest of it here

Man's Relationship Advice Same As His Hunting Tips

VERONA, WI—Friends report that HVAC installer Kirk Pulver has markedly similar advice on both relationships and deer hunting. "You have to dress either to blend in with the scenery or to stand out from it, depending on the situation, but either way, you want to disguise your scent," said Pulver to friends at a local tavern. "You have to find out where they eat, where they sleep, where they pee, and when they're most likely to be off guard. Then, when you've got a clear look at their rack and you're sure they're legal, bam! You take 'em." Pulver's associates noted that he has not bagged a deer or a woman in six years.

the onion (of course)

This is why I don't like sitting next to people on public transport...

The railway system groans under the weight of as many as four million travellers a day. Monday saw a record 3.8 million crowded on to China’s trains that chug slowly between cities as far apart as Harbin in the northeast and Kunming, about 30 hours away in the south.

Stations sell twice as many tickets as there are seats. Every space is filled. Travellers crouch on the floor, sleep in luggage racks and sit for hours in stinking lavatories. Using the toilet is out of the question.

Adult nappy sales are soaring — up by 50 per cent in some parts of southern China — as migrant workers prepare for 30-hour train journeys with no chance of a trip to the lavatory.

source

And bonus "words you thought you'd never hear":

But while the poorest of China’s city residents may earn little more than £200 a year, they can probably afford an adult nappy.

They cost 20p each, to provide a little comfort and dignity on the journey.

... cos "dignity" and "adult nappy" go together...