urgh

Dealing with a hairdresser can be bad at the best of times. They're so depressingly perky.

9am is not the best of times.

"entertainment" snark

Tom Cruise, via The Superficial

For her 27th birthday present, Tom Cruise gave Katie Holmes a DVD collection of every movie he has ever acted in. A source told the Daily Express:

"Each was inscribed with a special handwritten love message to the future mother of his child."

It's a mystery why everybody thinks Tom Cruise is an egomaniacal loon. For birthday presents I usually give people framed pictures of myself and they absolutely love it, so I know exactly where Tom is coming from. The guy really knows the spirit of giving. Nothing says 'happy birthday' to someone like a huge shrine dedicated to yourself.

homosexual mallard necrophilia

A unique Dutch double will soon be preserved in the Rotterdam Nature Museum - hailed as "the two most famous tragically dead birds of the 21st century".

The sparrow shot by an enraged domino enthusiast after knocking over 24,000 dominoes lined up for a world record toppling attempt will join another historic feathered corpse, the victim of the first scientifically-documented case of homosexual mallard necrophilia.

http://education.guardian.co.uk/higher/research/improbable/story/0,11109,1665418,00.html

(no subject)

beerkitty!

update also check out the radio ad version, from http://www.widmer.com/games/ads_radio.asp

- remember kids, avoid liquified meats

- don't drink people

...

smell that? it smells like... freeeeedom!

Victorian police have warned members of the Geelong Camera Club against taking photos of industrial sites, due to national security concerns.

Police officers warned the club against taking photos of the Shell oil refinery.

[...]

Gosh. Thanks for protecting us against those evil terrorists who HATE OUR FREEDOMS. I mean, if the terrorists had their way, we might all lose some of the FREEDOM. And no-one would want that. Well, perhaps a few people, but they are terrorists. Or police, who apparently didn't get the memo about how it's all about the FREEDOM. Or is it just for people in Iraq?

Late breaking update:

Police Counter Terrorism Unit Superintendent Andrew Crisp says he will speak with club members about their concerns.

"There's certainly no restriction on members of photographic clubs or people in general that want to take photographs of specific areas from a public place," he said.

"But in doing that, given the current environment in which we all living and working now, their would be an expectation that they might be approached by police."

Gosh? We're still allowed to take photos? In public even? Thank you ever so much, Mr Nice Policeman!

Now fuck off and tell your little stormtroopers to actually go do something useful. Like, say, catching bad guys.

And that goes for you too, Holding:

Police and emergency services minister Tim Holding said it was important to balance national security and civil liberties.

[...]

Mr Holding said he had yet to be briefed by police on the incident but said people should be allowed to photograph if they had no suspicious connections.

Jesus. Fucking. Christ. If we had wanted a pack of power hungry tinpot loonies in power, we would have kept Kennett. Notice that we didn't? Now get a clue, you totally useless waste of skin and organs. "Allowed to photograph if they had no suspicious connections"?? Should we maybe get a little card saying "Dear Mr Pig. I, , Do Not Have Suspicious Connections, And Am Allowed To Use A Camera In A Public Place"? Only if it helps keep us safe from the terrorists, of course. I mean, that's the important thing, after all. Anyone feel like wasting 15 minutes with photoshop to make up a "I Do Not Have Suspicious Connections" card?